Honesty Session #1

Hey y’all! I hope you had a great weekend. I know my weekend was wonderful. And I will probably tell you all about it sometime this week. But today I want to focus on one part of it. But this one part of it actually starts kind of last week and kind of for the past couple months. So here goes Honesty Session #1:

I have been wanting to start volunteering in some form of youth ministry outside of my church’s youth group (not that I’m quitting that but wanted to do this in addition to). I’ve been sitting on an application for a place called The Covenant House, it’s a homeless youth shelter. But never finished filling it out and turned it in. Also back in May I found out about this place called Freedom Place, it’s a care and recovery place for underage victims of sex trafficking. And  I wanted to volunteer there but never called to get an application.

Honestly– I hadn’t done these things because I’m lazy, and I doubt my ability to help those youth (stupid really because it’s not me who will be doing it but the Lord through me). I was allowing the enemy to win.

So the last two weeks I decided I needed to actually act on my desires to volunteer somewhere. So I finished the application for The Covenant House and I called and got the application for Freedom Place, and filled it out. But then I didn’t know what to do, because I don’t know how much time I will need to invest in each one, and I may only be able to do one of them. So I turned in the one for Freedom Place.

But then the doubt started. Did I turn in the right one. Does the Lord really want me to mentor a girl who was rescued out of sex-trafficking, or does he want me to work with homeless youth, or something completely different. And all the insecurity doubt started to play in.

Honestly– I’m so glad the Lord is perfectly patient and perfectly loving, because I doubt and question the Lord’s plan for my life so often. Not whether or not He has one but whether or not I’m doing what He wants and the things that are in His plan. He patiently listens to me question it. Then time and time again He reveals the yes I am or no I’m not.

I have been praying about my doubt, and whether or not the Lord wants me to volunteer at Freedom Place. (I had turned in my application Thursday). The Lord’s answer to my doubt came in the form of the Restoring Love Conference my roommate and I went to on Saturday night.

The conference was a history lesson, patriot pride, and church all in one. And the main charge was to restore love (God’s love) to our families, marriages, churches, communities, states, USA, and the world. Glen Beck talked about how in American History there are a lot of not so good moments (and by not so good I mean pretty terrible), but at the same time there is also really good moments. America isn’t perfect, and it’s still a work in progress. We as people are works in progress. But He said it is time for us to take a stand and say our love (God’s love pouring out through us) won’t be stopped, ruled, or regulated. We are free to share His love, and pour out His love. Glen also talked about the fact that this country won’t be good again until we as individuals stand up and start pouring out love. Matt Maher sang this song during the conference and it sums up a lot of what was spoken.

Glen Beck talked about the inspiration for these conferences he put on (this was the 3rd and final in a 3 year period), about how to change this country and get back to the roots of what makes us great, and how to get the call of Christ about there. He talked about how He prayed about the answers to those questions and He said he realized God has already given him a map, God already gave him the answer in His word, it was faith hope and love (those were the three themes of the conferences of these last 3 years).

Honestly– I realized the same thing was true of me. God has already given me His answer in His word. I don’t have to ask God if He wants me to serve Him, He’s already told me that He does. I don’t have to ask if I have the ability to do it, He has already told me no I don’t but that He will do it through me.

Honestly– The main call of the night was a huge reminder to me of how I want to live my life. Loving Deeply. And Sex-Trafficking not a very good moment, but Freedom Place caring for those children rescued out of it and helping them recover that’s a very good moment. Being able to pour Christ’s love into their lives and showing them His comfort, His love, His grace, His mercy… so good. Please don’t hear me saying that working with homeless youth isn’t also all those good things, because it is. Either choice would have been good. Either choice is serving the Lord and allowing Him to love through me.

Honestly– The Lord is so good. He answers our questions time and time again. Even when they are the same question over and over. He loves us so much. I can’t say enough about Him. I want to live my life praising and serving Him.


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